Om Nashi Me:

   Oh infinite.  And the trumpets will sound.  Shakers and tambourines.  J'ai guru.  Om.  Nashi.  Nakedness.  Leaders and Earthquakers. Deva. Me.
   I won't say that you gloating about your fantastical and oh so wonderful life.  Because you are.
  And all the words in the world will not save me.  Because only the intangible is tangible.  Om. Nashi. Que.
  And I will make the words up that must come. Only then will they mean anything.  Quelqu'un m'a dit.

. 

I am a whisper.  But my mind is screaming. 

I am nothing.

And it is all happening.

I will get out of here before long.

   They say I should sing and learn piano.  Languages and travel.  Ma vie. Om. Oh infinite nakedness and soulful woe. I may end this blog.  ....And cry out my days.  And the tears will feed nations.  J'ai nashi quelqu'un m'a dit.

If There's Anything to Say:

   So perfectly right, it was.

   Are we lost without each other?  Or do we wander lost together?
   And his most perfect response was,  "Are you a nomad, and me a vagabond?"  And it was this.  In a moment unrelated and yet, totally encompassing what an epiphany truly is.  I imagine his dark hair. And how he bites his lip and looks at me like he knows something I don't.  Please remember me. Happily.
   If you had a part of me, would you take your time?
   I have called you children, back from the hills, because I will return you to your door steps, even if it kills me, my fight is your fight.  Like a shepherd.  My words are my hope and I cannot deny my heart this.  I realize, I blog for myself yes.  But I write, write and wrap us in words, in hopes that my struggles and thoughts will carry others and help those back on their feet.

  I'll do anything for you. I'll do anything for you.  For him. For you.  For the future of our sanities combined and comprised of this struggle we call life.  It's all happening and we are together. What is there to answer if I am the only one?
  For so long I thought I was missing pieces.  And I am.  But I readily gave them away, they were not taken unwillingly.  Millions of little pieces of me for others.  People needed those pieces more than me, and I'm glad I could give myself away.  I can mend and grow.  I can send more and chase trains, watch colored birds, and breathe.  Because there is so much to look forward to, even if it is not at all what I foresaw or wanted. It's my fight.  Because I can fight it best and not give in.  Because I am strong enough.  I am. And you are too.

   If there's anything to say, or do.  I'll do anything for you.  My summer skin is shed.  I wear my mourning dress no more.  The trapeze wire in my mind is higher. And there's no net to catch.  Only words. Only souls. And we are okay.